Shingeki no Musical
by idontknow826
Summary: Basically the SnK cast do a series of flashmobs to some SnK parodies I found on the internet. R&R would be greatly appreciated! Rating may change, if I continue this
1. Chapter 1

Shingeki no Musical

**Moves like Jaeger**

It was a typical day in the Survey Corps HQ. Sasha and Connie were trying to sneak food out of the kitchen, Ymir was flirting with Krista, Levi was cleaning while Hanji told him about her titans, Annie was with Bertholdt and Reiner, and Jean was being a horseface. Mikasa was just chatting with Eren and Armin when suddenly; she heard some weird music coming from absolutely no visible source. It sounded a bit like some type of whistle. But when she asked her friends about it, they claimed they couldn't hear a thing. So, Mikasa ignored it…

…Until lunch that day. Mikasa began to hear the music again, and suddenly, Corporal Levi just got up and began dancing to the beat as the song launched into the lyrics.

_**Just shoot for the stars**_

_**If it feels right**_

_**Then aim for my heart**_

_**If you feel like**_

_**Can take me away, and make it okay**_

_**I swear I'll behave.**_

Mikasa stared at Levi in disbelief. _Did all that Clorox go to his head or something?!_ she thought. But, as soon as the next verse launched, Hanji and Commander Erwin got up and began dancing with Levi, much to Mikasa's further confusion.

_**You wanted control**_

_**So we waited**_

_**I put on a show**_

_**Now I make it**_

_**You say I'm a kid,**_

_**My ego is big,**_

_**I don't give a sh*t**_

_**And it goes like this…**_

Suddenly, Krista and Ymir jumped in and danced along behind Levi. This, was just getting weirder and weirder to Mikasa.

_**Take me by the tongue and I'll know you**_

_**Kiss me till' you're drunk and I'll show you**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moooooooooves like Jaeger.**_

Some other people had gotten up and joined the flash mob. This included Jean, Sasha, Connie, Reiner, Bertholdt, even Annie.

_**I don't need to try to control you**_

_**Look into my eyes and I own you**_

_**With them moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moooooooooves like Jaeger!**_

By now it was just Mikasa, Armin, and Eren left not dancing. Or so she thought, for when she turned around, they weren't there. Looking back up, she saw Armin dancing with the rest, but she couldn't see Eren. But soon, the second verse came up, and the whole group separated in half, revealing Eren in the middle, dancing to the lyrics.

_**Maybe it's hard, when you feel like**_

_**You're broken and scarred**_

_**Nothing feels right**_

_**But when you're with me**_

_**I make you believe**_

_**That I've got the key.**_

_**And it goes like this…**_

When it launched into the second chorus, Eren moved the center front and danced (a little suggestively) with everyone in sync behind him, following his steps.

_**Take me by the tongue and I'll know you**_

_**Kiss me till' you're drunk and I'll show you**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moooooooooves like Jaeger.**_

Mikasa could only watch out of shock and disbelief.

_**I don't need to try to control you**_

_**Look into my eyes and I own you**_

_**With them moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moves like Jaeger,**_

_**I've got the moooooooooves like Jaeger!**_

Then, the music ended with a whistled tune and everyone posed, except for Mikasa that is. She just smacked her head against the table.

Mikasa jerked awake, then felt relieved it was all a dream. But, then she smirked as the image of Eren dancing appeared in her head. She wouldn't exactly mind if Eren did those moves in front of her again….

* * *

Hey! It's the author! In truth, I have no idea what I was thinking. BUT! If you would like me to continue this, just say so in the reviews! Some SnK parody song suggestions would be great too! R&amp;R please!


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin. Nor do I own Legally Blonde songs.

Note: I highly recommend listening to the song before reading. Just look up **Jean Kirschtein: Gay or European** on Youtube.

P.S. If you are against homosexuality, or hate it to a fault, I suggest you not read this chapter.

P.S.S. This is for all you JeanxMarco fans out there!

* * *

**Is Jean Gay or European?**

It was their day off, and those in the 104th trainee squad were just talking and hanging about in the mess hall. Jean had decided to be a horseface at a different table with Marco, due to another argument with Eren, this subject being that Jean smells to girly to outshine Eren. Once he was gone, Sasha suddenly slammed her hands on the table, catching the attention of those around her.

"Okay guys, there is one very important matter we have yet to discuss," she announced. The others just stared at her in confusion.

Eventually, Connie spoke up, "Which is…?"

Sasha's eyes sparked with either mischief, or excitement, no one could really tell, "Is Jean gay?" she asked pointing at him, "I mean, just look at him!"

**Sasha:**_** There! Right there!**_

_**Look at that tan well tended skin.**_

_**Look at the killer shape he's in.**_

_**Look at that slightly stubbly chin.**_

_**Oh please he's gay, totally gay!**_

The rest just stared at her. Then, Reiner spoke up.

**Reiner:**_** I'm not about to celebrate**_

_**Every trait could indicate,**_

_**a totally straight expatriate.**_

_**This guy's not gay, I say not gay.**_

Now everyone wanted to pitch in with their opinions. They all looked at Jean, who was completely oblivious to their conversation.

**All:**_** That is the elephant in the room.**_

_**Well is it relevant to assume**_

_**that a man who wears perfume**_

_**is automatically, radically fey?**_

Then, they started taking his appearance into account.

**Bertholdt:**_** But look at his croft and crispy locks.**_

**Annie:**_** Look at his silk, translucent socks.**_

Reiner cleared his throat, catching everyone's attention.

**Reiner:**_** There's the eternal paradox.**_

_**Look what we're seeing.**_

**(Sasha: **_**What are we seeing?**_**)**

**Reiner: **_**Is he gay…**_

**(Sasha:**_** Of course he's gay!**_**)**

**Reiner:**_** …Or European?**_

Everyone froze and stared at Reiner. No one had ever even thought of that option.

**All:**_** Ohhh…**_

They all stared at Jean again who was still unaware.

**All:**_** Gay, or European?**_

_**It's hard to guarantee.**_

_**Is he Gay, or European?**_

They all looked to Connie, to which he just shrugged and shook his head.

**Connie:**_** Well, hey don't look at me.**_

Mikasa spoke, much to everyone's surprise.

**Mikasa:**_** You see they bring their boys up different**_

_**in those charming, foreign ports.**_

_**They play peculiar sports…**_

Everyone joined in.

**All:**_** In shiny shoes and tiny shorts.**_

_**Gay or foreign fella?**_

_**The answer could take weeks.**_

_**They will say things like 'Ciao bella'**_

_**while they kiss you on both cheeks.**_

**Sasha:**_** Oh please, gay-**_

**All:**_** Or European?**_

_**So many shades of gray!**_

Bertholdt quickly pointed out something.

**Bertholdt:**_** Depending on the time of day,**_

_**the French go either way.**_

**All:**_** Is he gay or European?**_

_**Or-**_

Suddenly, Annie noticed Jean smirking and laughing at something Marco said, so she stood up and pointed to him.

**Annie:**_** There! Right there!**_

_**Look at that condescending smirk,**_

_**seen it on every guy at work.**_

_**That is a metro hetero jerk.**_

_**That guy's not gay, I say no way!**_

She sat back down and everyone continued to voice their opinion.

**All:**_** That is the elephant in the room.**_

_**Well is it relevant to presume**_

_**That a hottie in that costume-**_

Suddenly, they all saw Jean with his arm slung around Marco's shoulder, while leaning on him. They assumed that their suspicions were confirmed.

**Krista:**_** Is automatically-radically…**_

**Eren:**_** Ironically chronically…**_

**Sasha:**_** Certainly pertin'tly…**_

**Connie:**_** Genetically medically…**_

**All:**_** GAY!**_

_**OFFICIALLY GAY!**_

_**OFFICIALLY GAY GAY GAY GAY-**_

Then, Jean caught Mikasa's eye, and blushed.

**All:**_** D****T!**_

_**Gay or European?**_

**(Reiner:**_** So stylish and relaxed.**_**)**

_**Is he gay or European?**_

**(Connie: **_**I think his chest is waxed**_**)**

**Mikasa:**_** But they bring their boys up different there **_

_**it's culturally diverse.**_

_**It's not a fashion curse…**_

**All:**_** If he wears a kilt or bears a purse!**_

_**Gay or just exotic?**_

_**I still can't crack the code.**_

**Ymir:**_** Yet his accent is hypnotic,**_

_**but his shoes are pointy-toed.**_

**All:**_** Huh.**_

_**Gay or European?**_

_**So many shades of gray…**_

Mina randomly spoke up from somewhere in the room.

**Mina:**_** But if he turns out straight,**_

_**I'm free at eight,**_

_**on Saturday!**_

By now, everyone was getting frustrated.

**All:**_** Is he gay or European?**_

_**Gay or European?**_

_**Gay or Euro-**_

Suddenly, Armin spoke up.

**Armin:****Wait a minute!****Give me a chance to crack this guy.**

**I have an idea I'd like to try.**

**Reiner: The floor is yours.**

Armin made sure everyone was watching, then, he walked up to Jean and started talking to him.

**Armin: So, Jean… this alleged affair for Mikasa has been going on for…?**

**Jean: Two months.**

**Armin: And your last name again is…?**

**Jean: Kirschtein.**

**Armin: And your boyfriend's name is…?**

**Jean: Marco.**

Everybody made an audible gasp.

**Jean: I-I'm sorry! I misunderstood! You said boyfriend, I thought you said best friend! Marco is my… Best Friend.**

Then, Marco abruptly stood up, and surprised everyone with what he said next to Jean.

**Marco: You b*****d!**

**You lying b*****d!**

**That's it! I won't cover for you anymore!**

He faced the crowd.

**Everyone! I have a BIG announcement!**

_**This man is Gay AND **__**European!**_

**All: Woah!**

**Marco: **_**And neither is his place.**_

_**You've got to stop you're being**_

_**A completely closet case!**_

_**It's me, not her, he's seeing.**_

_**No matter what he say.**_

_**I swear he never ever ever swing the other way.**_

He turned to Jean.

**Marco**: _**You are so gay!**_

_**You big parfait.**_

_**You flaming boy band cabaret-**_

**Jean:**_** I'm straight!**_

**Marco: **_**You were not yesterday.**_

Marco faced the crown once more and called out with his loudest voice.

**Marco:**_** So if I may, I'm proud to say:**_

_**He's GAY!**_

Everyone joined in and shouted along with him.

**All: **_**And European!**_

**Marco: **_**He's Gay!**_

**All: **_**And European!**_

**Marco: **_**He's Gay!**_

**All: **_**And European and GAY!**_

**Jean: **_**Fine okay I'm gay!**_

**All:**_** HOORAY!**_

Then, Shadis burst through the door and commanded why it was so loud in there. To which Mikasa responded by saying Sasha farted. Again.

* * *

Wooh! That was a long one! If you have listened to the song/ have heard it before, you might have noticed I made a few changes. I did that because, Well, I figured Armin asking for his last name would make more sense because he already knows his first, and the fact that Jean had a crush on Mikasa and _not_ a relationship. And I didn't really know who to put for the whole "I'm free on Saturday" part so I just put Mina since she's generally a minor character. Also, the font that is in italics and bold means their _**singing**_, bold means the dialogue is **part of the song**, and normal lettering is just part of the story, sorry if you got confused it just ended up that way. R&amp;R please!


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin. If I did, a lot of these stories would be canon or an OVA or something.

* * *

**Annie, are you ok? **

_**Year 844**_

Annie sat down on the floor of her father's bedroom, exhausted. A burglar had just broken into her home via the window, and attacked her. Luckily, due to her training, she was able to knock him out, but not before he landed an injury on her. The man had a knife, and he was able to cut her arm, leaving a slash that was deep enough to bleed. Suddenly, she heard the door open. _Father must be home,_ she thought, and soon enough, the blonde man came rushing in. Annie was about to explain what happened, when she heard some strange music emitting from absolutely no visible source. Then, her father glanced around at the damage, and began singing.

_**As he came into the window,**_

_**It was a sound of**_

_**A crescendo.**_

_**He came into the apartment,**_

_**He left bloodstains,**_

_**On the carpet.**_

_**She ran underneath the table**_

_**He could see she was unable.**_

_**So she ran into the bedroom**_

_**She was injured,**_

_**It was her doom!**_

Annie's father grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her, as if trying to wake her from a nightmare.

_**Annie Are You Ok? **_

_**So, Annie Are You Ok**_

_**Are You Ok, Annie?**_

_**Annie Are You Ok?**_

_**So, Annie Are You Ok,**_

_**Are You Ok, Annie?**_

_**Annie Are You Ok?**_

_**So, Annie Are You Ok?**_

_**Are You Ok, Annie?**_

_**Annie Are You Ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok, are you ok, Annie?**_

Silently willing her father to stop shaking her, she also heard harmonizing voices repeating her father's words, as if there were backup singers in the room with them.

_**(Annie are you ok?)**_

_**(Will you tell me that you're**_

_**Ok?)**_

_**(There's a sign in the**_

_**Window)**_

_**(That he struck you-**_

_**A crescendo Annie)**_

_**(He came into your**_

_**Apartment)**_

_**(He left the bloodstains on**_

_**The carpet)**_

_**(Then you ran into the**_

_**Bedroom)**_

_**(You were injured)**_

_**(It was your doom!)**_

Then her father starting speaking, or, singing, solo again. Annie was starting to get irritated at his weird behavior, and the headache that was forming from the constant shaking.

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**You've been hit by**_

_**You've been hit by-**_

_**A Smooth Criminal!**_

Suddenly, her father stopped shaking her (much to Annie's relief) but instead straightened up and began spinning around and dancing right in front of her while shouting out at random moments. Annie raised her eyebrow questioningly at his actions, but stayed silent. She would be lying to say she wasn't the least bit interested to what would happen next. Then, her father launched into the next verse, while still dancing.

_**So they came into the outway**_

_**It was Sunday-What a black day**_

_**Every time I tried to find him**_

_**He's leaving no clues left behind him**_

_**And he had no way of knowing **_

_**of the suspect or what to expect**_

_**Mouth to mouth resuscitation**_

_**Sounding heartbeats intimidations...**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok, are you ok, Annie?**_

_**(Annie are you ok?)**_

_**(Will you tell me that you're**_

_**Ok?)**_

_**(There's a sign in the**_

_**Window)**_

_**(That he struck you-**_

_**A crescendo Annie)**_

_**(He came into your**_

_**Apartment)**_

_**(He left the bloodstains on**_

_**The carpet)**_

_**(Then you ran into the**_

_**Bedroom)**_

_**(You were injured)**_

_**(It was your doom!)**_

_**Annie are you ok?**_

_**So, Annie are you ok,**_

_**Are you ok Annie?**_

_**You've been hit by**_

_**You've been hit by-**_

_**A Smooth Criminal!**_

As her father kept dancing, Annie heard a clatter of noise outside, "Ok, I want everyone to clear the area right now!" someone called. _Did he get the Military Police?_ She wondered. Sure enough, several men ran in bearing military uniforms with the unicorn seal on their jackets. But, much to Annie's surprise, when they saw what her father was doing, they began to dance in sync and sing along as he sang a bit of solo.

_**(Annie are you ok?)**_

_**I don't know!**_

_**(Will you tell us,**_

_**That you're ok?)**_

_**I don't know!**_

_**(There's a sign in the window)**_

_**I don't know!**_

_**(That he struck you-**_

_**A crescendo Annie!)**_

_**I don't know!**_

_**(He came into your apartment)**_

_**I don't know**_

_**(Left the bloodstains, on the carpet)**_

_**I don't know why, baby!**_

_**(Then you ran into the bedroom)**_

_**I don't know!**_

_**(You were injured)**_

_**Dad gone it!**_

_**(It was your doom -Annie!)**_

_**(Annie are you ok?)**_

_**Dad gone it-baby!**_

_**(Will you tell us, that you're ok?)**_

_**Dad gone it –baby!**_

_**(There's a sign in the window)**_

_**Dad gone it –baby!**_

_**(That he struck you-**_

_**A crescendo Annie!)**_

_**Hoo! Hoo!**_

_**(He came into your apartment,)**_

_**Dad gone it!**_

_**(Left the bloodstains on the carpet)**_

_**Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!**_

_**(Then you ran into the bedroom)**_

_**Dad gone it!**_

_**(You were injured**_

_**It was your doom- Annie!)**_

After they ended the chorus, they all kept dancing to the music that kept playing from no visible source, Annie's father kept shouting out as well. Finally, when the music faded away they all stopped. Then, they all surveyed the house as if nothing had happened. But, Annie felt a little disturbed by this whole experience, mainly because her father and the soldiers did a series of _energetic_ pelvic thrusts as they danced with all their might. As the Military Police finally left and her father preparing some relaxing tea for the ordeal, Annie made sure to give her father a strong drop-kick and walked to her room to be alone.

Ever since then, whenever someone asked if she was 'ok', she is reminded of those scenes. And then she proceeds to punch the person who dared to ask.

* * *

I bet a lot of you guys were expecting this one! In all honesty, it actually got a little hard after a while, since it's so repetitive. So, I apologize if I got anything wrong or ended up confusing you guys as well. *bows* R&amp;R please!


	4. Chapter 4

I still don't own Attack on Titan. Hajime Isayama does.

I don't own Mulan either.

* * *

**Be a Man Parody** (I don't really know what to call it…)

Shadis stood in front of the 104th batch of trainees. It was the first day of training, and already he could see a bunch of teens who wouldn't last a day out there with the titans. "All right you poop-knobblers," he shouted loudly, "Now I don't want no screwing around, with you batch of meat-tossers!" This sent several trainees shaking already. Shadis sighed before he went to yell at them some more. _We've got a long way to go_, he thought.

(Time skip, brought to you by Eren's (slightly) suggestive moves like Jaeger!)

It was the next day, and the trainees, fully equipped with their gear and uniforms, were in formation in a large field in the middle of the forest, set up with a very grueling-looking obstacle course complete with mud puddles, a river, and fake titans to kill. Shadis walked up in front of them and (much to the trainees' confusion) began to sing in his loudest and best voice.

**Let's get down to business,**

**To defeat Titans.**

He glared at Armin, who flinched into a salute.

**Did they send me daughters?**

**When I asked for sons?**

**You're the saddest bunch I've ever met.**

**But get your gear,**

**Prepare, for a ride.**

**Someday we'll fight titans..**

…**side by side.**

The trainees all started with the fake titans first, slicing the material on the back of the necks and flying around on their 3D gear. Shadis continued:

**Tranquil as a forest,**

**But a fire at will.**

He watched as Mikasa made a giant slice on one of the "titan's" neck. Eren followed, but made a much shallower slice, not enough to be able to kill the real thing.

**Once you find you're center,**

**You'll be able…**

**..to kill!**

**You're a spineless, pale,**

**Pathetic lot.**

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Armin and Connie practically crash into each other.

**But before the time goes by,**

**Someday we'll fight titans,**

**Side by side!**

They continued on with the obstacle course, which included running 20 laps around the field,

**Sasha:**

**I'm never gonna catch my breath**

Grueling spars with the instructor,

**Connie:**

**Say good-bye to those who knew me**

Exercises, in which they did at least 100 each, leaving many exhausted,

**Jean:**

**Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym**

More yelling at trainees,

**Ymir:**

**The instructor's got 'em scared to death!**

**Christa:**

**Hope he doesn't see right through me…**

And swimming across the river and its incredibly strong currents.

**Bertholdt:**

**Now I really wish that I knew how to swim!**

Even thought they were exhausted, the trainees decided to join in with the invigorating song and Shadis' strengthening chorus, as they saw their skills and endurance improve.

**[Kill titans!]**

**We must be swift with the 3D gear,**

**[Kill titans!**

**With all the force of a great typhoon.**

**[Kill titans!]**

**With all the strength of Colossal Titans,**

**Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!**

Soon, they went back to killing the fake titans, while Shadis continued the song with the next set of verses.

**Time is racing towards us,**

**Til' titans arrive.**

**Heed my every order,**

**And you might **

**survive!**

He was enraged when some trainees came up to him and asked to go back to the fields, to which he gave them a prompt yelling, while singing.

**You're unsuited for, **

**The rage of war.**

**So pack up, go home,**

**There's your ride.**

**How could we fight titans…**

…**side by side?**

While still flying around, the trainees joined back in the song with Shadis.

**[Kill titans!]**

**We must be swift with the 3D gear,**

**[Kill titans!]**

**With all the force of a great typhoon.**

**[Kill titans!]**

**With all the strength of Colossal Titans,**

**Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!**

**[Kill titans!]**

**We must be swift with the 3D gear,**

**[Kill titans!]**

**With all the force of a great typhoon.**

**[Kill titans!]**

**With all the strength of Colossal Titans,**

**Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!**

They all jumped from the tree tops of the forest with their gear, and cried out in unison:

**HYAH!**

None of them saw Shadis nodding in the background.

* * *

'Ello there audience! Author here! I know, I know, I could have just done the mostly original version of 'Be A Man' with only replacing a few of the lyrics, but where's the creativity in that? Even so, I'm kind of regretting making an entire parody of the song, I'm not the best songwriter, and sorry if this wasn't as funny as the other chapters. Oh well, too late now. I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Also, for those who didn't know, the song I used for chapter 3 is 'Smooth Criminal' by Michael Jackson, King of Pop. R&amp;R please!

(Also, whoever can tell me what I'm referencing in the first few sentences Shadis says gets a virtual cookie!) \\(^u^)/


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin

Not do I own Sailor Moon

* * *

Jean was walking down the hallway of the Survey Corps HQ when he stumbled over Eren, who, for some reason, crouched down in front of a door.

"What the heck Jaeger?!" Jean yelled, but he was quickly shushed by the person in question.

"Shut the heck up Horseface, and just watch," Eren whispered as he pointed the slightly opened door in front of them. Jean looked through the crack and had to clap his hand over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud.

What he saw was Levi. Levi was cleaning, per usual, but he was also dancing….

…and singing.

Well, he was singing to a song being played on a nearby laptop (and making up his own lyrics), but it still counted. Jean and Eren leaned as close as they dared, enough so they won't get caught, but enough to hear what Levi was singing:

_**Killing titans by moonlight,**_

_**Cleaning HQ by daylight.**_

_**Never running from Mikasa!**_

_**He is the one named Levi Heichou!**_

Soon, Eren called over most of their friends, which included Armin and Mikasa, Marco, Annie, Bertholdt, and Reiner, Connie and Sasha, Ymir and Christa, heck, even Hanji and Erwin were there. Fortunately, they all understood that Levi dancing and singing was a rare spectacle to be seen, so they all kept quiet. That, and the fact that if Levi found out they were all watching, they would all never see the light of day again… or worse...

Even so, that didn't stop the stray giggles and snorts of people trying to hold in their laughter. Oblivious to having an audience, Levi danced and sang on:

_**He would never just ignore a mess,**_

_**He is there to kill the titans.**_

_**He is the one on whom we can depend!**_

_**He is the one named Levi…**_

_**Survey Corps!**_

_**Commander Erwin!**_

_**Leader Hanji!**_

_**Titan Eren!**_

_**Cleaning up all those brats' messes!**_

_**He is the one named Levi Heichou!**_

The video on the laptop then played a guitar solo, to which Levi used his broom as an electric guitar, and started pulling dance moves of awesomeness only Humanity's Strongest can perform. Yet, he was still oblivious to his comrades watching in awe and muffled laughter outside the door.

_**Killing titans by moonlight,**_

_**Cleaning HQ by daylight.**_

_**With the Survey Corps there to help fight!**_

_**He is the one named Levi Heichou!**_

_**He is the one named Levi Heichou!**_

_**He is the one…**_

_**Levi Heichou!**_

The music ended with the beat of a drum and Levi posed, quite fabulously I might add. Jean couldn't take it anymore; he just burst out laughing 'til his stomach hurt, and everyone joined in. Then, they saw Levi swiftly turn around and give them a glare that, if looks could kill, would send them more than just six feet under. So they all quickly scattered as fast as they could in order to escape from Levi's wrath.

But, as Jean was fleeing, he saw Hanji running alongside him, holding a phone camera. Jean stared at her in confusion and shock while he was trying to keep his breath.

"Hanji, have you been filming this entire time?" he asked between pants. She just turned to him, her signature insane smile on her face, and she nodded. Then, she proceeded to sprint on ahead of him, no doubt to her office… to post her new video on the internet.

That night, the yells of rage and the sounds of insane, victorious laughter could be heard for miles both inside and outside the Survey Corps HQ.

* * *

Konnichiwa/Konbawa/Ohayo [trans. Good afternoon, good evening, and good morning... I believe]! Author here! First of all, I must give credits to my good friend (both virtually &amp; in real life) enchantedtale13, they helped come up with the parody. Yeah, I know, this isn't exactly in the same style as the other chapters, I guess it's because the song is a little shorter, along with the fact that no one is making any real verbal sound other than Levi. I don't know, it just turned out that way. Also, I guess this chapter could in general be counted as an AU [alternate universe] because everyone has an electronic device. And I know, titans are generally solar powered so it would be impossible to fight them at night, but screw it this is my story and that's how it ended up. So... yeah. R&amp;R please!


	6. Chapter 6

I AM SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN LIKE MONTHS OR SOMETHING AND I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR ANY FOLLOWERS/FANS WHO HAVE STAYED FAITHFUL TO THIS FANFICTION! ;n;

Disclaimer: I do not own this song (the original nor the parody)

Disclaimer #2: I certainly do NOT own AoT/SnK. It is too awesome for me to claim.

Note: the parody is written and sang by Sir Hamnet on youtube. Look it up!

* * *

Do you wanna kill some titans?

It was the year of 845, a young Eren ran through the hallway to his adopted sister's room with a play sword in hand. Knocking on the wooden door in a rhythmic pattern, he sang out, "Mikasa!"

"_**Do you wanna kill some titans?**_

_**Come one let's go and fight!**_

_**You always act like such a bore,**_

_**Come out the door.**_

_**Let's make sure they all die!**_

_**I told you 'bout the Survey Corps,**_

'_**Cuz I trusted you.**_

_**Why did you go tell mom?**_

_**Do you wanna kill some titans?"**_

He cupped his mouth to the door knob muttered,

"_**Even if it's just one titan**_."

"Stop it Eren" his sister called out, Eren's face fell, but he didn't press her. Instead, he ran back outside, whilst calling out,

"_**Then I'll go on!"**_

After that, the fall of Shiganshina and Wall Maria had taken place. Eren and the 104th trainee squad had made it through the trainee corps and were now proud members of the Survey Corps.

It was their fourth day living in the Survey Corps HQ and Eren had decided to confront Corporal Levi about something. Looking through the open door of the horse stables at his cleaning superior, Eren knocked and sang,

"_**Hey, Corporal!**_

_**Do you wanna kill some titans?**_

_**Or 3DMG 'round the walls?**_

_**I think some practice time is overdue.**_

_**I've started talking to, the horses in the stalls!"**_

Eren turned to a horse nearby,

"_**Hang in there Clyde!"**_

He turned back to Levi.

"_**It gets a little boring,**_

_**Cleaning all these rooms,**_

_**Just watching the hours tick on!"**_

Eren clicked his tongue for effect, mimicking the sound of a clock ticking away.

Soon, the next expedition came up. And the mystery of the female titan had already been solved, after mourning for the loss of Levi's squad and forming a plan to infiltrate where the female titan's shifter had been residing, Eren now stood in the designated underground path. Mikasa and Armin were already out stalling the female titan, which had just proved herself to be Annie Leonhardt, and were waiting for Eren to shift. But, Eren couldn't. He was still dealing with the shock of one of his old comrades being the enemy. Carefully, almost absentmindedly, he knocked on the stone wall beside him, and quietly sang,

"Annie?"

"_**I don't know what to think now…**_

_**People are wondering who you are.**_

_**They say 'It can't be'**_

_**And I'm trying to, to understand how you,**_

_**Made it this far…**_

_**We're nothing like each other.**_

_**Now it's you and me.**_

_**What am I going to do?"**_

Suddenly, the ceiling crashed in, causing a wooden beam to spear Eren in the chest, but he didn't notice. Instead, he raised his eyes to see his best friend fighting the enemy, and all the memories of his mother dying to those monsters came flooding back to him. As he regained his strength, he smiled bitter sweetly and muttered,

"Hey Armin…

"_**Do you wanna kill this titan…?"**_

A flash of lighting appeared, and the battle of the century ensued.

* * *

Once again, *ahem* I AM INCREDIBLY SORRY FOR THE WAIT I CAN'T EVEN EXPLAIN HOW DISSAPOINTED IN MYSELF AND I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE HOW YOU GUYS MUST BE FEELING I APOLOIGIZE TO THE FULLEST EXTENT! But seriously, I am truly, truly sorry for making you guys wait so long. I have had camp this past few weeks, along with a gigantic writers block for parodies (even though that is hardly a valid excuse). Even so, I really REALLY would appreciate it if you guys could suggest songs/ideas via review and/or private message. I don't mind coming up with a song myself but I would really prefer you suggest a song or parody for me since I suck at writing songs so... yeah. R&amp;R and Follows/Favs are always appreciated!


	7. Chapter 7

WARNING: VERY CRACKY AND MAY NOT MAKE MUCH SENSE. PLEASE NOTE THAT I WROTE THIS AT 2:12 AM

Still don't own SnK... wish I did though...

* * *

Levi awoke to the sound of singing. Yes, singing. At sunrise, about 6:00 in the morning. Apparently, Cadet Braus and Cadet Springer had thought it to be a brilliant idea to sing about potatoes in the morning. They sang together simultaneously as they ran down the hallway, Springer strummed away on a random guitar he had found.

"_**Potato potato potato po-**_

_**Tato potato potato potato **_

_**Potato potato potato**_

_**They're red, they're white, they're brown,**_

_**They get that way underground.**_

_**There can't be much to do,**_

_**So now they have blue ones too!**_

_**We don't care what they look like we'll eat them,**_

_**Any way they can fit on our plate.**_

_**Any way we can conjure to heat them,**_

_**We're delighted and think they're just great!**_

_**Potato potato potato po-**_

_**Tato potato potato potato **_

_**Potato potato potato**_ …."

Levi heard their singing fade away, and concluded that they had run off, probably to raid the kitchen. Unable to get back to sleep after that little disruption, Levi decided to go ahead and get ready for the day.

….

Walking down the corridor, Levi stopped in front of Hanji's office to deliver some papers. Raising his hand, he prepared to knock, only to freeze at the sound of music. He pressed his ear to the door to listen better.

"…_**I wanna be, where the tians are…**_

_**I wanna see, wanna see 'em running!**_

_**Walkin' around with those…**_

_**What are they called again?**_

_**Oh yeah, abberants!"**_

Levi froze as he realized who was singing. _D**n… who knew Four Eyes could sing…._ He thought as the woman in question continued to sing her sweet melody on the other side of the door.

"_**Up where they walk,**_

_**Up where they run,**_

_**Up where they stay all day in the sun.**_

_**Wanderin' free,**_

_**Wish I could be,**_

_**Part of their world!**_

_**What would I give,**_

_**If I could live out of these walls?**_

_**What would pay,**_

_**To spend a day with the titans~?**_

_**Betcha' out there, **_

_**They understand, and don't eat animals.**_

_**So many titans,**_

_**Spending their lives out,**_

_**Outside the walls!**_

_**And I'm ready to know what the titans know!**_

_**Ask them my questions**_

_**And see if they'll answer!**_

_**Why are their shifters and why do they…**_

_**What's the word? Transform?"**_

This is where Levi pulled away. As much as a good singer Hanji was, surprisingly, he just couldn't take it anymore. _It's too early for this s**t_ the grumpy corporal thought. So, instead of directly delivering the papers, Levi just left them in front of the door, knocked, and bolted.

Walking out to the stables to clean them, he happened to pass Eren, Mikasa, and Armin. Suddenly, Eren started singing in a loud, cheerful voice:

"_**Ne ne papa what's in the basement?**_

_**Ne ne mama! Ne ne mama!**_

_**I can't seem to forget that time when you were eaten**_

_**Right before my eyes!**_

_**Draw a circle there's the walls,**_

_**One got broken now two walls,**_

_**Draw two circles there's the walls**_

_**I'M GONNA KILL THEM ALL!"**_

Levi winced as Eren practically screamed that last part. Then Eren returned to his chipper tone as he sang on.

"_**Ah~ a marvelous world,**_

_**Can be seen if we aren't eaten alive,**_

_**And now, we do our really cool salute,**_

_**It's Shingeki no Kyojin!"**_

Levi stared at the trio as Eren began to sing the song over again. Mikasa noticed him staring and shook her head, her usual hatred towards him replaced by a disbelieving and slightly irritation mixed with exhaustion aura. "He's been like this all morning," she stated stiffly, as if reliving a bad and slightly awkward memory. Levi only frowned and continued on his way. _Why, in the name of Erwin's eyebrows, is everybody f***ing singing?_ He thought irritated.

As the day proceeded on, Levi only hoped it wouldn't get worse. Ah how wrong he was. For today, everyone had 3DMG training; to refresh their memory of how to do it and to make sure everyone's gear was working properly. Levi had just finished his and he saw Connie about to take off as well.

Suddenly, a slow beat melody started playing, from absolutely nowhere, just as Connie hooked onto a tree as was about to swing towards it. As he jumped, to Levi's horror, he began to sing.

"_**I believe I can fly!**_

_**I believe I can touch the sky!**_

_**I think about it every night and day,**_

_**Spread my wings and fly away.**_

_**I believe I can soar!**_

_**I see me runnin' through that open door.**_

_**I believe I can fly!**_

_**I believe I can fly!**_

_**I believe I can fly!"**_

Connie continued to sing as he swung left and right through the maze of trees. Levi didn't wait to hear more, as soon as Connie sang "I believe I can fly" for the 10th time, Levi was back in the castle.

…

Levi did his best to avoid everyone for the rest of the day, not wanting to hear anyone sing another word. Soon, it was dinner, and Levi was eating, peacefully ignoring Hanji's rant, who thankfully, was not singing. Suddenly, he hears shouting and the sound of someone getting up. Looking over, he saw that it was Eren and Jean. Levi froze in terror, not because Eren was singing again, (thankfully, he had stopped as well) this time, it was Jean.

"_**Mother****** I'm awesome!"**_

Eren jutted in.

"_**No you're not dude, don't lie!"**_

Jean sang again.

"_**I'm awesome! I'm drivin' round in my mom's drive.**_

_**I'm awesome.**_

_**A quarter of my life gone by.**_

_**I'm awesome.**_

_**Even though my best friend just died!"**_

Levi raced to his room, ignoring the strange looks of those he passed. He couldn't take it anymore, to his knowledge the world had gone insane. Turned into a freakin' musical. [Author: He's not wrong X3 *shot*]

Slamming the door to his room, he collapsed on his bed and just laid there for 5 solid hours until he eventually slept, hoping that tomorrow would be music-free.

Little did he know, that somewhere in the outside, Armin was sneaking off into the night, holding a suspicious-looking guitar case. Once he had gotten to the top of a hill, Armin opened the case to reveal a shining, red electric guitar. Where he got it from, no one will know.

Slinging the strap around his shoulder, Armin tuned the instrument to make sure it was working properly. Then, he quickly strummed it epically while screaming out a loud battle cry.

**_"YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHH!"_**

* * *

Author at your service! Offer up your hearts the weirdness! Haha, I kid, I kid. Anyway, I pretty much had a brain fart for this chapter... so... yeah. The songs used for this go as shown in order:

Sasha &amp; Connie: The Potato Song (look it up on youtube, that is some weird stuff!)

Hanji: Part of Your World - The little mermaid (AoT parody)

Eren: Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia ending theme) parody I found in a youtube comments section ;)

Connie: I believe I can fly

Jean: I'm awesome

Armin: I have no idea :P I heard the part Armin sings in come crack video and decided to throw it in there.

There ya go! Sorry I don't have any full songs in this chapter, I'm tired and lazy right now :P

R&amp;R please + requests!

(BTW, yes, Mikasa is remembering her dream from the first chappy!)


	8. Chapter 8

Merry Christmas &amp; Happy Holidays guys!

I do not own Attack on Titan

Nor do I own this awesome song; it's called 12 Days of Christmas Medley and is sung by Straight No Chaser

* * *

"GUYS! LET'S GO CAROLING!"

All eyes turned to Hanji, who was standing with her hands in the air to get everyone's attention with Moblit standing next to her and holding about a billion sheets of paper. Some people laughed at the idea, out of both mockery and amusement. Of course _Hanji_ would think this up, especially since Christmas was just a few days away.

Levi spoke up from the crowd, "What the heck are you thinking Four-eyes? Right now? Right this instant?"

Hanji nodded, "Of course! Levi, you and your whole squad could come! Erwin, you and Mike come too, we need some good basses."

Before anyone could protest, Hanji had suddenly rounded up chosen 'Carolers', which included; herself, Moblit, Erwin, Bertholdt, Reiner, Annie, Eren, Armin, Krista, Mikasa, Ymir, Jean, Marco, Sasha, Connie, and of course, Levi (through the tactic of threats to steal his bleach)

Once giving everyone a music sheet, they all rode through the winter weather into the nearest town, which had quite a lot of people bearing through the cold to peruse the markets for holiday wares.

The Survey CorpCarolers (what Hanji was now calling them) all gathered in front of a large, frosted fountain in the middle of the cold square with Hanji in the middle to conduct their singing. They were all fairly nervous (with the exception of Levi, who was just annoyed), for none of them had ever had much experience in singing, and didn't want to embarrass themselves in front of this many people. But despite pleas and protests, Hanji just wouldn't have it.

"You'll all do fine! Plus, this song is _very_ simple," she laughed. They were separated in two groups, waiting for Hanji to start. Raising her arms, she gave a signal and they began to sing.

**Group 1 [G1] **(Levi, Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Sasha, Connie, Jean, Marco)

**Group 2 [G2]** (Hanji, Moblit, Bertholdt, Reiner, Annie, Krista, Ymir, Erwin)

**All: ****On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me,**

**a partridge in a pear tree.**

**On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,**

**two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.**

**On the fourth day of Christ-**

**G2: On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me,**

Group one looked at their counterpart group with confusion, but tried to not falter in their song. How little did they know that this was only the beginning in their confusion.

**All: Five golden rings!**

**G1: Four calling birds**

**G2: Three french hens**

**G1: Two turtle doves**

**All: And a partridge in a pear tree!**

**G1: On the ninth day of Christmas**

**My true love gave to me,**

**G2: On the eighth day of Christmas,**

**G1: Nine ladies dancing**

**G2: My true love gave to me,**

**G1: Eight ladies dancing,**

**G2: Eight maids a-milking**

** G1: Seven ladies dancing**

**G2: Seven maids a-milking**

**G1: Six ladies dancing**

**G2: Six maids a-milking**

**Five-**

**G1: You better not shout, you better not cry,**

This time Group Two were the ones to look at the others in confusion, except for Hanji, who just went with it and urged them to do the same.

**All: You better not-**

**In a pear tree!**

**G1: On the ninth-**

Group two interrupted Group one, some shaking their heads and others looking at them incredulously. Group one shared confusing glances and tried again.

**G1:** **On the eighth-**

They were interrupted again, this time mostly by Hanji, who immediately began to sing a different tune with Group two joining her as the other group attempted a third time.

**G1: On the seventh days of Christmas my true love gave to me**

**Hanji: Deck the halls with boughs of holly**

**G1: Seven swans a-swimming**

**G2: Here we come a-wassailing**

**G1: Six geese a-laying**

**G2: Among the leaves so**

The second group eventually gave up and continued with the first group.

**All: Five golden rings!**

**G2: Four calling birds,**

**G1: Three french hens,**

**G2: Two turtle doves,**

It was here that the cadets realized their songbooks separated, each group beginning to once again sing different songs that clashed but strangely harmonised all the same before coming together.

**G1: Here we come a-wassailing**

**G2: A boar's**

**G1: Among the leaves so green,**

**G2: Head in hand bear I**

**All: Bedeck'd with bays…**

**And partridge in a pear tree!**

**On the eleventh day of Christmas**

**My true love gave to me,**

Suddenly, the songs separated again, and everyone's eyes were directed confusedly to their songbooks as both tune and lyrics suddenly changed and got more confusing. However, they were all able to keep up.

**G1: Eleven pipers piping**

**G2: Ding,**

**G1: Ten lords a-leaping**

**G2: Dong, **

**G1: Nine ladies dancing**

**G2: Ding,**

**G1: Eight lords a-leaping**

**G2: Dong,**

**G1: Seven swans a-swimming**

**G2: Ding,**

**G1: Six geese a-laying**

**G2: Dong,**

**All: Five golden rings**

**Four calling birds**

**Three french hens**

**Two turtle doves**

**And-**

**Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer~**

**All: On the twelfth day of Christmas**

Suddenly, Hanji stepped up, and began to sing her own song that was irrelevant to the whole thing.

**All: My true love gave to me-**

**Hanji: I have a little dreidel,**

**Hanji: I made it out of clay!**

**And when it's dry and ready,**

**A dreidel I shall play!**

**Oh~ dreidel drei-**

The others looked pointedly at her, some speaking up to stop her and shaking their heads.

Levi spoke up to stop her further,

"Twelve days of Christmas, four-eyes, Eight days of Hanukkah."

"Oh."

Erwin spoke up, small amusement evident in his voice, "It's a Christmas medley."

Once that was settled, they all went right back to singing.

**All: On the twelfth day of Christmas **

**My true love gave to me-**

**Doo doo do do doo dooooooo-(do de do de do de do de do**

**de)**

**Doo doo do do doo dooooooo-(do de do de do de do de do**

**de)**

As everyone continued to sing these simple lyrics, Jean began to sing the solo, surprising everyone with his smooth voice that _wasn't_ at all like a horse's; like they expected it to be.

**Jean: On the twelfth day my true love gave to me**

**12 drummers drumming like olympus upon the serengeti**

**11 pipers piping, 10 lords a leaping...**

Some of the other guys soon joined in.

**9 ladies dancing they were dancing for meeee**

**8 maids a milking they were milking just for me**

**I had Christmas down in Africa **

**(ba ba ba doo)**

**I had Christmas down in Africa **

**(ba ba ba doo)**

**I had Christmas down in Africa **

**(5 golden rings!)**

**I had Christmas down in Africa **

**(5 golden rings!)**

**I had Christmas down in Africa **

**(5 golden rings!)**

**Couldn't take the halls into the things we never had**

**All: Doo doo do do doot dooooooo-(do de do de do de do de do**

**de)**

**Doo doo do do doot dooooooo-(do de do de do de do de do**

**de)**

**Partridge in a big pear tree-(do de do de do de do de**

**do de)**

**Partridge in a big pear tree~!**

As soon as they all ended that note in unison, the citizens watching all applauded them, a few even requested an encore. While the cadets and waved happily to the crowd and accepting the applause excitedly, Levi turned to Hanji, his eyes not their usual coldness.

"You know sh*tty-glasses, I guess that wasn't too bad after all."

Hanji smiled cheekily, a small blush on her face from the cold.,

"Just wait until you see what I have planned for your birthday~"

Levi looked at her and his usual frown settled on his face as he glared softly at the brunette.

"D*mn you four-eyes."

* * *

Happy Holidays all you Fanfictioners! 'Tis the Author! Sorry for no updates lately, school stress, mental instability, and pure procrastination. Basically the typical life of a student in today's modern world. Anyway, for those confused with this chapter, I don't blame you. The song (as nice as it is) is pretty confusing itself when you first hear it, and it was a bit difficult to turn it into a fanfic. that and the website's glitching for me so I can't make it double spaced :(. Also, for those who didn't know: Levi's birthday is also on Christmas Eve! So, that explains the ending (along with some LevixHanji, if you really squint). Anyway, that's it for me. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a Happy New Year to all of you!


End file.
